I almost collapsed and fainted in the office last week (17 April 2013)

Sorry, this is so long. This is only about a half of what I want to share actually. I’m so struggled nowadays if you know. Mama is going through chemotherapy and her antibody is getting weaker and weaker now. I felt so uncomfortable every day because I can’t do anything to help, besides supporting and “keep praying” !!! 

2 days later, which is [11 April 2013 Thursday]

Sister called and told me Jim “my dog” is going to die. She said he is very very very sick, his legs were trembling all the time and having a high fever. I'm really exhausted, I kneel on the floor and tears keep falling from my eyes.

My sight got more blurry and I thought I was going to faint. I tried to close my both eyes and putting my forehead on my hand on the table. The burdens on my shoulder are like never go away?

I knew God planned every day for me. I believe he will make a way for me but, I’m so tired and I’m so afraid of things now. I am worn-out for keep crying recently.

Two days after, which is [13 April 2013 Saturday]

when I got home I saw mama so sick, Jim is so skinny and left only bones. Well, they seem happy to see me again and Jim welcome me. Although he doesn’t have energy, but he was trying hard to walked near me. I tried my very best of the night taking care of him; giving him the best care I could to make him feel better at least? I carried him the whole night, to eat, to drink to pee, to everywhere he wants to go and to do things he wants to do.

I can’t continue anymore. Wish all these happened are just a dream, hope I can wake up tomorrow...